Week 9 Update

Well, week 8 was nothing to right home about, that's for sure! I have never, ever had morning sickness this bad. Last week was the worst. A good friend let me borrow Sea Bands which helped manage the sickness enough that I could actually drink and keep something down. I lost 4 pounds because of how sick I was and I am still not sure if maybe I had a stomach bug on top of morning sickness, because it was BAD!
Week 9 has started off MUCH better! I am pretty good on the sickness front unless I let myself get too hungry. Warm liquids, such as broths and hot tea, have helped tremendously. I almost feel like a normal functioning person again.
I am still very nervous because our insurance has not all worked out for me to see the dr yet and with the blood clotting disorder I have I need to be on blood thinners from early on in pregnancy until I have baby. The risk for miscarriage(which we have endured 3 of) increases the longer you are not on the blood thinners. Please pray with us that everything will be worked out and I can get into the dr soon. I know that the Great Physician, my Savior, has his hands on this baby and his/her health so I am trying to just rely on his promises and not worry too much about the issues.
Quite honestly I have been emotionally drained over the last week because I have spent my time worrying and fretting at every little crampy pain or weird feeling I have. It is so hard early on, when you can't feel baby move and know that they are ok. I have decided today that I am not going to ask my God to take care of all the issues but then continue to worry and stress about the issues. He is in control. Good or Bad. My husband, the ever faithful one, said to me last week "Kelli, who is in control? Isn't God good in all things" Emotionally i was not ready to hear that then, I broke down and cried(and cried, and cried some more) YES, the answer is yes he is in control, and he is good in all things. It just wasn't very comforting at that moment because all I could think was "Yes he is in control, but he was in control the last 3 miscarriages we had  as well, so just because he is in control doesn't mean that things will always turn out the way I would like them to"
I have spent a lot of time since then praying and pleading with God to give me the peace that I need to let him have control and to trust that he is working all things together for my good, no matter what the outcome.
It seems like when you are in ministry and you are really working for the Lord that Satan will attack in any and EVERY way that he possibly can. Kevin has gently reminded me at points throughout the week to be prepared for Satan's attacks and to send him away wounded when he does attack, instead of allowing him to do the wounding. The truth is that each testing is an opportunity for you to Glorify God who has already defeated the enemy!!
I wont pretend that I don't get discouraged and that I haven't let Satan win a few battles this week but I am purposing to send Satan packing, and trust in the grace of God to get me through each moment. He will provide what we need, in his timing, and no matter the outcome, HE IS GOOD!!