Godly Confidence- Your worth, found in the shadow of the cross.

I’ve always been a little jealous of the Proverbs 31 woman. She set such a high bar of expectations that it seems impossible to measure up. That is what we do right? Spend our whole lives trying to measure up, fearing that we won’t be good enough, we will never be accepted, and become so paralyzed by fear that we sit idle and watch life pass us by missing opportunity after opportunity. I’ve spent the last year trying to figure out why we let fear control us? Is it a lack of confidence? Is it an abundance of pride? Fear of failure is an immobilizer in my own life. It keeps me from going back to school to pursue a teaching career because I’m too old, from cooking meals for my family because I am a horrible cook, from being the best mother I can be because I can never accomplish all that needs to be done. Yet I read about this woman and the one verse that stands out to me is vs 25. 

Strength and dignity are her clothing. She laughs without fear of the future.

 I’ve always read that vs and thought “man I wish I could have that kind of confidence”.

Many Christians struggle with the thought of Confidence. They seem to be confused between Godly Confidence and pride. Even Self-confidence as defined above is healthy when we ultimately find our confidence in the realization of all that Christ is and all that we are not.

Confidence is… Quiet

Pride is… Loud

Confidence is…Willing to learn

Pride…knows it all already

Confidence is… selfless

Pride is… selfish

Confidence…knows it weakness

Pride… thinks it has none

When confidence turns to pride, we stop learning. Healthy confidence knows it’s strength and abilities but is willing to ask for help and knows it’s weaknesses.

Scripture encourages Godly confidence…

Jeremiah 17:7

 Blessed is the woman who trusts is in the Lord, and has made the Lord her hope and confidence. For she is like a tree planted by the water, whose root are deep, she does not fear the heat, and continues to produce fruit even in the time of drought.

Comparison is the enemy of confidence

 Don’t get caught up in comparing yourself to others. 

DO NOT compare your outtakes to someone else’s highlight reel. 

Social media has created a monster. Here we are looking through our news feed and we see the mom at our church who has her 2 toddlers perfectly dressed and both smiling so sweetly for a candid photo with their arms around each other like they just love each other to pieces. Meanwhile we just tried to get one decent picture with all of our kids in it which resulted in hair being pulled, fingers being stepped on, the baby is screaming his face off, the oldest is wrestling the screaming baby and keeping that smile glued on her face because she’s finally reached the age that she knows to look at the camera and smile no matter what, the boys are in a fist fight, and the 3 year old has her finger up her nose. Instagram doesn’t have a filter for that!! Our old highschool friend is tweeting about her extravagant vacation while the closest thing I’ve had to a vaca in the past month was a 10 minute shower at the YMCA because I actually get more privacy in the communal shower than I do at home!! But here is what we fail to remember… it probably took 10 retakes, an outfit change, and some major bribery for a trip to Jumping Joeys for that perfect picture and our friend didn’t tweet about the long nights spent at the office working overtime, the massive amount of debt they may have accumulated to get that vacation, and the fact that they will be working late nights for months to pay it off. We can’t edit real life the way we edit our FB page and no one’s life is what it appears to be from the outside.

Some of us are better than others at playing the masquerade game when we are slowly dying inside. God created us to come together and support one another. How are we supposed to be a support system when every time we come together we all act like we have it together and leave the same hurting, heart-broken, falling apart mess that we came in as. I get it, sin has perverted the hearts of us all. We are terrified that if anyone knew the real us, the broken, hurting, struggling, drowning us they would never let us in the door of the church again. Guess what??? That’s all of us. We are all just too afraid to say it. Instead, when asked how we’re doing we respond with the obviously fake “Oh, everything is great”, “couldn’t be better” or my favorite… FINE… Fine is just code for Frazzled, Irrational, Neurotic, and Exhausted.

When we realize that God created us on purpose, for a purpose, and with a purpose we will stop looking to finite things around us to find our purpose and look to him to fulfill the story he has already written for us. (Ephesians 2:10)

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus, unto good works, which he planned for us before the world began.

When you embrace who God created you to be, you will find confidence and joy. We were created to bring him glory. This totally changes the perspective and turns our eyes toward him. When we have the proper perspective everything else just falls in to place.

God is not looking for a perfect woman, he is looking for a woman who wants to walk with Jesus and find her confidence in her daily dependence on him.

Renee Swopes

  

Where are we seeking confidence?

Many times we are guilty of seeking our confidence in things. While many of these things are a necessary part of our lives we short circuit the plan of God when we allow them to become the pursuit of our happiness.

We are holding up the empty cup of our heart to all of these things begging them to fill and fulfill us yet still come to the end of those things feeling empty and unfulfilled.

We create idols of the very things we’ve been blessed with in life because we loose sight of the giver and his desire to bless and fill us and turn our focus to the gifts he’s given. They were meant for our good but not for our fulfillment.

Idols we beg to fill us

Relationships

Parenting

Career

Education

Hobbies

Ministry

Church

Entertainment

Possesions

Status

Acceptance

Approval

Jeremiah 29:11-13  When God was talking to Jeremiah in this passage the Israelite's were so deep in the throws of idolatry that they couldn't see the one who gave them all they had. They were seeking and seeking to be filled but were coming up empty. They were making literal graven images of the blessings God had given them(sun, moon, stars, animals, etc...). What we don't realize is that we are doing the very same thing today. All the blessings God has given us(family, friends,talents) have become our idols and he is begging us to come back to him and seek him with our whole heart, just like he was begging the Israelites. 

When Jesus is not in the center of it all, our schedules, minds, stomachs, closets, and lives are full yet our hearts just keep coming up empty. We hear God’s promise for abundant life yet we can see nothing abundant in our life except busyness, obligations, failures, and exhaustion. Sometimes we need to lower our expectations of ourselves and lighten our overloaded list of commitments.

Stop allowing the pain of your past to determine your future, Don’t let your broken dreams become bitter expectations.

Your trying to earn your value in all that you do, but you will never find the love that you are longing for in anyone or anything but God. Until God’s love is enough, nothing else will be.

Maybe you are at a place in life where you just feel completely unlovable. Let me tell you that Satan would love nothing more than for you to stay right in that place but your advocate is greater than your adversary. Maybe you have spent the entirety of your life seeking for love in all the wrong places and you always come up feeling more alone, empty and unloved than you did before.

God placed the desire for unfailing love in our hearts because he knew that it would lead us to him. Unfailing love is mentioned 32 times in the bible and never once is it attributed to a person, Only God!

Psalm 90:14 Satisfy us each morning with your unfailing love,

    so we may sing for joy to the end of our lives.

 I find my confidence in knowing that I am completely loved in this moment and God is not waiting for me to get my act together in order to become worthy of his affection. RIGHT NOW in this very moment you are loved, pursued, and seen by the One who sees everything; He knows you better than anyone, even yourself, and he has NEVER been disappointed by you!!

We were made for a love that is not measured by our last accomplishment but marked by God’s measureless grace.

 That Grace is seen in God’s perfect love story. When he sends his only Son to die for us so that we can spend eternity with him. If we are depending on who we are it will never be enough, we are constantly failing, falling short of the mark of perfection, but we were never made to meet that mark. Jesus is the only one who ever met that mark and he willingly gave his life to pay for the sins that we have commited so that we could have the assurance of spending eternity in Heaven, eternally covered by God’s grace and love. And when we stand in the shadow of that cross, unworthy and undone, we will find the open arms of our Saviour time and time again. What kind of love is that?!?

God wants us to find lasting security in knowing we are valued and pursued by the one who knows us better than anyone and loves us in spite of our failures and short comings. He is not limited by our limitations. He is going to fulfill his will and purpose w/ or w/o you, but he is inviting you to join him in the journey.

The first step of the journey is admitting to him that you are completely unworthy. Your sin is a barrier between having an amazing relationship with him for eternity, but when you ask him to cover the multitude of your sins with the precious blood of Jesus you can begin walking the journey of confidence knowing that you are loved unconditionally and he wants to use you to do great things.

Let God lead you beyond believing IN him to Believing Him by relying on the power of his words and live like they are true, no matter what your feelings are telling you.

Spend time reading your Bible… The more you hear Gods word the more you will believe it, rely on it, and live like it is true. The closer you get to Jesus the more clearly you understand his purpose for your life.

Find what triggers your doubt… when we loose focus on Christ we are easily distracted by fear, failure, conflict, discouragement, comparison, worry, criticism, etc… When you find yourself in the shadow of self doubt realize that you have lost focus on Jesus and turn back to the light.

Find who you are in Christ. Our passions are built into us by our creator because he knew that they will conform us to his purpose for our lives. 

 Live life knowing that you are

Chosen, Accepted, Loved, Pursued, and Invited to live a life of confidence.

It all starts in the shadow of the cross. 

El Roi- The God who sees me

Week 2 of 52

El Roi- The God who sees me

 

 

 

Week 1 we looked at the name Jehovah Jireh, The Lord will provide. For those of you who follow my facebook page you may have already seen some instances how this was true in our life last week. The very next day, we received an unexpected check in the mailbox that was just enough to pay some bills. We are short on income this month because my husband works at a college and they are shut down, without pay, for the whole month. Then, Wednesday, Kevin went to the grocery store to pick up a few items and found a large roast(big enough to feed our large family 2 times with plenty of left overs) normally costing $25.00 on sale for $7.00!! Thank you Jehovah Jireh!!

 

 

This week I wanted to look at El Roi, The God who sees me. Although I have known this as truth from a very young age, it has become increasingly important to me through the years. When I was younger, this meant to me that God was watching me. Be it good or bad, he knew my EVERY thought and action. As I have grown it's meaning has brought great comfort and joy in times when I have felt alone or unimportant.

 

Sometimes we as parents may be guilty of using this as a threat(of sorts) toward our children. While this may not necessarily be a bad thing, I think we must be cautious when using a quality of God as a fear tactic against our children. I, myself, have often told my children this in numerous discussions about obedience...

 "You should obey the rules and do what is right, even when you think no one is watching; because God is always watching. He sees everything you do and hears everything you say. He even knows what your thinking when you don't say it out loud."

 

While this is true, I think that we should first impart in them the awe of the attribute, the goodness that God intends it to be, before we use it to impart the fear of a great big God watching their every move. When they properly understand God for all the great things he is, their heart will long to do good in his sight, without us having to scare them into it.

 

Impart in them the truth of Scripture; that God has known them from the beginning of time, he knows every good thing he wants for them, every decision they will make, and how it will affect their future. One of my favorite Bible passages, as an example of El Roi, The God who sees me is

 

Jeremiah 29:11-13

11 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. 12 Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. 13 And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.

 

 

This passage is one reason that I am doing this study. I have often concentrated on the first verse as a source of encouragement, but just a few months ago the last verse really caught my attention. I thought "Wow, what does it mean to be seeking god with my whole heart? Am I doing that?"

 

 How wonderful the promise that we will find him if we search for him with our whole heart!!

 

 

Another of my favorite passages to reiterate El Roi is Psalm 139. The Psalms are so packed full of promises about who God is... Our shield, strength, salvation, rock, fortress, refuge, deliverer, I could go on and on, but we would be here for a while!! 

 

The subheading in my bible for this passage says "God's perfect knowledge of Man"

 

 

Psalm 139

O Lord, You have searched me and known me.
2 You know my sitting down and my rising up;
You understand my thought afar off.
3 You comprehend my path and my lying down,
And are acquainted with all my ways.
4 For there is not a word on my tongue,
But behold, O Lord, You know it altogether.
5 You have hedged me behind and before,
And laid Your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
It is high, I cannot attain it.

7 Where can I go from Your Spirit?
Or where can I flee from Your presence?
8 If I ascend into heaven, You are there;
If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there.
9 If I take the wings of the morning,
And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
10 Even there Your hand shall lead me,
And Your right hand shall hold me.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness shall fall[a] on me,”
Even the night shall be light about me;
12 Indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You,
But the night shines as the day;
The darkness and the light are both alike to You.

13 For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
14 I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;[b]
Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well.
15 My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them.

17 How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!
How great is the sum of them!
18 If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand;
When I awake, I am still with You.

19 Oh, that You would slay the wicked, O God!
Depart from me, therefore, you bloodthirsty men.
20 For they speak against You wickedly;
Your enemies take Your name in vain.[c]
21 Do I not hate them, O Lord, who hate You?
And do I not loathe those who rise up against You?
22 I hate them with perfect hatred;
I count them my enemies.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me, and know my anxieties;
24 And see if there is any wicked way in me,
And lead me in the way everlasting.

 

 

 

Wow! How wonderful is it to know that we have a God who cares so much about us, me and you, personally that he cares to know the very innermost thoughts we have. He knew me even before I was conceived. He hand picked my parents, my husband, and my children all for me before I was even made. How precious are his thoughts towards me.

 

In all that he has created, his still cares enough to know me, by name. 

 

I cannot even begin to fathom this. I have a hard time calling my children by their name some days and I only have a handful.

 

He knows you better than anyone else. He is here to comfort you when no one else will be.

 He is ever faithful to you and committed to knowing EVERYTHING about you.

 

When you are afraid, he is your comfort.

When you are tired, he will give you rest.

When you feel alone, he's right beside you

When you cry, he cries.

When you rejoice, he rejoices with you.

When you are in pain, he feels it too.

 

It really is the ultimate relationship that anyone can ask for. He is the only one capable of loving me unconditionally. No matter what I do, or think, he will love me. No matter how I hurt him or turn from him, he will love me. No matter how much I disobey, or how long I run from what he has called me to do, he will love me.

 

He is El Roi, The God who sees me. At my worst, at my best. He sees my every need, my every want, and hears my every prayer.

 No one know me more than he does and I want to know his just as intimately as he knows me.

 

This week, no matter what you face, strive to seek God as El Roi. Know that he sees all and he cares for you. Thank him for loving you enough to care about EVERYTHING that goes on in your life. Turn to him, instead of worry and fear, when things aren't going exactly as you might want and ask him what he is trying to do for you.

 

 Work to impart this truth into the lives of your children this week.  

 

 

 

Jehovah Jireh, The Lord will provide.

In my resolution to improve my relationship with the Lord this year I thought it would be really cool to look at all his different names. I know about a handful of them and their meanings but have never really concentrated on them. I am hoping to look at a different name of God each week this year, in an effort to really know God for who he is!

One of my all time favorite names for the God...

Jehovah Jireh- The Lord will provide

Passages that come to mind when thinking of Jehovah Jireh would be...

1. The Children of Israel, who were wandering in the dessert, grumbling about not having any food, and God(Jehovah Jireh) sent them Manna; literally food falling from Heaven. It can't get too much more obvious than that.

2. When Abraham is just about to offer his son, who was promised to be the father of many nations; yet was not of age to even have one child, as a sacrifice because God had asked him to. In the bravest act of obedience, a ram appears, caught in a thicket and is a replacement sacrifice for Isaac. If that isn't an amazing picture of the wonderful saving grace of Jesus I don't know what is. I wonder who provided that lamb?

3. Obviously The Lord who provides the ultimate need of all mankind, The Lamb, The Atonement, The Savior of the world. Wow.

 As well as countless times in the new and Old Testament that God supplies the needs of his people.

Sometimes I forget that The Lord, My provider, cares to provide even for the littlest of my needs, even my wants.

We all have needs, some greater than others, and my heart breaks when I see those around me whose needs are great but they are looking for provisions in all the wrong places. I really am not sure how we would make it through life if we did not have Jehovah Jireh as our source of provision.

Most months after our Tithe and rent are paid there is little to nothing left for groceries or utility bills and we have 6(soon to be 7) mouths to feed and bathe. Sometimes I think the Lord is crazy for adding another one to our family! However, Jehovah Jireh, always provides for our needs. Even when we don't know where it will come from or how it will happen, it always shows up.Month after month, all the bills get paid and all the mouths get fed. To think that I still stress over it, I should know by now that he is faithful, when we are faithful, and he will always provide. Even when we act like the children of Israel and grumble because the Manna from heaven isn't good enough, he provides quail. I literally used to think my husband was crazy when he would pray specifically for something he wanted. I would actually get angry sometimes, thinking "where do you think that is possibly going to come from when I am worried about putting food on the table this week". Yet it NEVER fails, the very thing he asked God for will show up in the mail from a random place, a check for the exact amount I needed for my grocery budget and the exact cost of what he wanted will appear in the mailbox. It used to anger me and he would say, if you had faith you'd do the same. I spend a lot of time praying for our needs to be provided, the last thing on my mind is something I want. Maybe it is a lack of faith on my part? I don't know. I can tell you countless times I have prayed "Lord it will take a miracle to pull this off. You know this unexpected expense has come up, the car broke down, the kids got sick, etc.." and he'll send the very miracle I doubted.

I find myself wondering what life would be like without Jehovah Jireh. I don't even want to think about it. All the hurt, anguish, and poverty in the world has come as a direct result of sin, and turning from Jehovah God. Some people would disagree with this, saying that there are thousands of impoverished nations who can't be helped, but I guarantee if you trace it far enough back in history it is as a direct result of that nation turning it's back on God, and sadly friends, I'm not sure America is far behind. Those nations can be helped, the answer is, and always has been, from the beginning of time Jehovah Jireh! That's the very reason we are commanded to go and tell the nations. It is not too late. If we would do what we are commanded the gospel could be spread to all nations, every tribe and every tongue. God would not give us an impossible task, but he also will not sit back and watch our disobedience forever. We have got to tell the world that there is a Provider and he wants to provide their every need.

This week as you go through your daily life, thank God each time he reveals himself as Jehovah Jireh, The Lord who provides. Thank him for electricity, clean running water, a roof over your head and pray, desperately pray, for those who aren't looking to him to provide these things.

However, don't just sit back and be thankful for him as your provider, go tell someone about how he can provide for their needs. Be Jehovah Jireh to someone who is in desperate need of a provider, and make it known that HE is the ultimate provider and he wants to provide for them. This week, show someone the same GRACE that he has given you, in an effort to know God for who he truly is Jehovah Jireh!



What does it mean to Draw near to God? Part 1

As the new year approaches it is one of my main focuses to be intentional about my relationship with Christ. I don't just mean that "yes, I'm a christian and I love the Lord" kind of relationship. I am talking about an all out, no holding back, commitment to bettering my relationship with him. I can't count the number of times I have counseled others about a good relationship with the Lord. It like any other earthly relationship takes open communication, commitment, time, energy, and focus. It is not something that just happens because you say a pray and accept Christ as your Savior. Sure that means your relationship has started with him but in order for it to be a GOOD relationship you need to invest in it. How great would your friendships, marriages, and other relationships hold up if you didn't put any time and energy into them?

The Lord has continued to put this verse in my path the last few weeks. Being married to a preacher, when we spend long periods of time in the car we usually listen to sermon pod-casts by various pastors. It is something we both enjoy(the kids aren't thrilled, neither was I when I was a kid and my dad listened to sermons on long car rides) plus it sparks conversations and in my case blog thoughts. Funny how a lot of the sermons we listened to traveling from place to place for the holidays concentrated on prayer and asking God for things. Some were good, others seemed to portray our relationship with Christ like that of a consumer and a vending machine, he gives and we take.

 But what does it truly mean to draw near to God?

I am no theologian, and I wont claim to be; but I just wanted to share some of my thoughts on drawing near to God.

Prayer

Prayer is a key factor in relationship with God. Many view it as a chore, something that is hard to do, a burden... I would challenge you to look at prayer in a different light. Prayer is intimidating to some people, seasoned Christians or new Christians. However, most of them have been given an unreasonable idea of prayer. All prayer is is talking to God. Think about what your relationship with your spouse would be like if you NEVER talked?! Even worse... What if your spouse only talked to you when they needed something?  Seems absurd to even think about, yet many of us take that approach with God. We never talk to him and we never listen to him either, we'll get to that aspect in a moment. The only time we run to him in prayer is when our lives are falling apart and we have tried everything we can to fix it ourselves before we finally decide to go ask him for help. I don't know about you, but I have some of those people in my life. They only call when they need money, or they've hit rock bottom. If I miss a call from them I worry about them and their well being just knowing somethings gone wrong or else they wouldn't have called. That's no kind of a relationship to have with someone, is it??

Prayer doesn't have to be fancy, you don't have to use old English words that no one understands. God is relevant, he's not stuck back in the future somewhere only able to understand the language and redirect from that day. Contrary to what many old timey preachers may say, or what you've been taught. It's not like you have to learn a foreign language to talk to him. You don't have to shut yourself in a closet, fold your hands, bow your head, etc... Prayer is a continual act. As a matter of fact the bible tells us to "Pray without ceasing"Thes. 5:17. Do you really think it means stay in your closet all day and pray? NO It just means take time in all of your day and your activities to include talking with God. For me this means simply muttering, sometimes not even audibly, a thank you for the blessing you come across in you day... The smile of your toddler and sweet "I love you mommy" she has just uttered, the success of your emerging independent 5 year old, the very fact that your 6 year old is living breathing proof of God's miraculous healing power even if that very same stubbornness that caused him to fight for his own fragile life causes him to fight you tooth and nail on every issue, the honesty and development of your beautiful 8 year old clone whose learning to cook and clean and thinks mommy is the greatest woman alive. A plea for help and patience when you encounter your little cutie pie with a marker in hand and the Picasso painting she has drawn on your wall or herself, the cry or display of anger when your emerging independent 5 year old has encounter failure or a task that's too hard for his skill set, the stubbornness and determination of your 6 year old that you are sure will either kill you or cause you to kill him, the frailty of your emotional 8 year old as she encounters those in life who aren't as kind hearted and caring as she had imagined them to be. Other times for me this means I do need to get somewhere alone and quiet and pray for serious issue, this is usually when you will find me in the shower, crying and talking to God. As silly as this may sound... I pray every time I enter the highway that there will be no traffic coming and I wont have to merge into a mess of cars. Call it what you may but 99.9% of the time, there is no traffic!! God doesn't care where I am, what I am wearing, or what's going on around me, as long as I am including him in my day. He doesn't need me to pray to him, but he's asked me to, and it is a display of my love towards him.

Another of my favorite verses is found in Jeremiah 29. I love verses 11-13

 

¹¹ For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. ¹² Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. ¹³ And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.

 

I have always paid special attention to verse 11 but in this season of life the Lord has highlighted verse 13 in my heart.

 

 You will seek me and find me, WHEN YOU SEARCH FOR ME WITH ALL YOUR HEART.

 

This is what started the whole goal to concentrate on my relationship with him this coming year. I thought... Am I searching with my whole heart? Am I really drawing near?  Am I putting in all the time and effort that I put into my earthly relationships? Hmmmm. Seems like there is room for improvement. Just like in every other relationship, it is constant, if your not working on it your probably regressing. God's not hiding from us. Scripture tells us he is always near. He just wants a little effort on our part. He's tired of the lopsided relationship where he gives and we take.

 

I'll leave you tonight with this thought and then we will pick up on Part 2. tomorrow.

 

If you feel far from God, consider that it isn't him that moved, he is constant!!

 

So, in 2014, make communicating with God a consistent part of your everyday. Not just a ritual before meals and bedtime, but a meaningful conversation with the greatest friend!! Not only will this improve your walk with God but it will improve many aspect of your life as well.

 

Mommies and daddies... don't hide in your closets to pray. Make prayer an obvious part of your daily life, as an example to your kids. Sometime in life our kids need to know that we don't have all the answers, but we can point them to the one who does. Mommy and daddy may not always be there in times of fear and failure, misunderstanding, or triumph, but if they know they can talk to an ever constant God then they will never feel alone and they will always know where to turn. Be an example of his grace in their lives, start with teaching them they can always talk to him!!