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| and why it's so importnant |
I can't do it all!!
Even if on a daily basis I could do it all, without being so stressed out, what happens when I am unable to do what I do??
As moms, and homemakers, we should take our responsibility seriously. We should do all that we can do be sure that our family feels best when at home and that home is neat, clean, well organized, and FUN!! However, many of us, or at least me, fail to understand that doing it all is not healthy for anyone involved.
Reasons?
1. It's stressful for mom, especially the larger your family grows. Even super mom, especially if she has OCD, can not do it all.
2. It's not a healthy reality. Did any of you get where you are in life today by having no responsibility?
Now, I have always held to the " A good mom can do it all " theory. Meaning if you were in the least bit frazzled, didn't finish your to do list, make an amazing craft, prepare all the meals, excavate the mountain of laundry, bath your kids every night, and do it all with a smile, while looking like a super model YOU FAIL!! Your cape is being revoked. What a laugh right?
Who on earth can live up to those expectations? and Why do we as young mothers buy into that lie? Well I have my opinions on that, but that's a whole other subject, on how society, reality TV, and social media is warping our expectations and perception of reality!!
Honestly, even if you can do all those things and keep it together, with little to no stress. It is not a healthy reality for your kids.
Our society has turned parenting into friendship, responsibility into entitlement, and hard work into a rarity. The American dream is the next generations nightmare, because somewhere along the line we have believed that we should make our kids all think they are winners all the time and that they will get everything in life handed to them. I am all for being your kids biggest fan but they need to know the reality of loosing too. Parents who love their kids discipline them, give them boundaries and borders! Money can't buy their happiness, good thing for us cause there is not a lot of that floating around here. We wonder why there is an entire generation of lazy, entitled, selfish brats. Why there are adults who don't want to work but expect to be spoon fed. Maybe, just maybe, it's because their parents raised them without expecting anything from them. We can't expect a child to do nothing their whole life and then MAGICALLY when they turn 18 to become a responsible adult! It's not something that is in their blood that jut kicks in at a certain age. It is a whole life time of training.
I totally get it. For an OCD mom who enjoys serving her family, it really does just seem easier for me to do it all, my way. However, just recently, again because of bed rest, I have realized that this is not healthy for our family. When mommy can't do it all and the house falls apart... that's a reality check!! It just isn't fair for daddy to work part time, do everything that church planting requires, and have to do mommies job too. Especially when most of it is kid's messes that they re more than capable of cleaning up.
For us this has meant implementing chores, as well as, a list of family responsibilities. Chores are something that they get a small payment or reward for. Family responsibilities are things that you do because every family needs to work together as responsible individuals to accomplish all that God has intended for us to do! It has been marvelous. Mostly because I CAN NOT sit all day and look at a mess and then sit and watch my wonderful husband clean up something that I normally take care of, but it has already reduced my stress level and I am sure will only help once the baby arrives!! Who knows, maybe some of the more important things that often get missed will get done more often!
I've got a whole board on pintrest dedicated to this subject. I've researched age appropriate chores, but in the end I just went with my gut on what my kids where capable of. If you would like to check out my pintrest page and follow along here is the link...
Here's to raising responsible kids!!
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